The Golden Bachelorettestar Joan Vassos is a smart and sensitive woman who’swildly in love with Chock Chapple, and that’s a beautiful thing, but the first flush of romance may be clouding her judgment, making her much too trusting. The truth is that a lot of guys who appear on reality TV shows are not worth the effort. In other words, trying to believe in them is a mistake.
A person sinks time and energy into trying to trust, and that investment can pay off, but it can be a waste of time. Reality TV attracts a certain element -people who desperately want attention. This means that men may be players, clout chasers, or liars, or “all of the above.” The man that Joan gave her final rose seems to care about her, butChock does have some red flags. Caution is recommended as she moves forward. Joan’s been hurt in the past. Four years ago, she lost her husband to pancreatic cancer - that was extremely traumatic.
She Puts Chock On A Pedestal
Is She Idealizing A Flawed Person?
Lately,Joan’s been gushing aboutChock’s ability to fix shelves. As per her Instagram, he’s dazzlingly
“handy.”
He’s got tools galore and knows exactly how to use them. Joan said that, thanks to him, she now owns a"stud finder,“and then called him a"stud.“She is madly in love with Chock. His practicality turns her on. That’s fine, but the issue is that she’s obviously got him on a pedestal. Does he really belong there?
When Chock aces even the most mundane tasks around her home, she marvels at his brilliance.She thinks he’s a mastermind. This is a classic case of idealizing a partner. It’s romantic, to be sure, but fraught with peril. The higher the pedestal, the further a man can fall. So, Joan needs to try and be realistic about her romance. She should appreciate her new man withoutbelieving that Chock’s a perfect person, as no one is perfect.
This is such a sticky wicket. How does a person love completely without idealizing? Maybe it can’t be done. On the other hand, idealizing can lead to heartache.The person on the pedestal may not want to be there because they know they don’t belong there. They may live out a lie to try and seem like someone who belongs there. For that reason, this type of romanticism can create a troubled dynamic.
The person who’s adored may hide things to try and maintain their image, secretly wishing they didn’t have to live up to such lofty ideals.
Romance is a gamble and Joan has every right to roll the dice, but the outcome’s always uncertain. This is why she is smart to wait to marry this man.As time passes, more facts rise to the surface, allowing for a clearer picture of a person’s character.If that time isn’t taken, there may be nasty surprises later on.
Just waiting and seeing how things evolve is crucial.
The more time she spends with Chock,the more likely she is to know the real him. So, her desire to wait a while before getting married is coming from a place of wisdom. He may truly be a wonderful person, as she believes, but it’s too early to say for sure. How people act while the cameras roll isn’t always the best indicator of their real selves - they are trying to please an audience.
Joan Is House-Hunting With Chock in The Big Apple
Is She Wearing Rose-Colored Glasses?
The way that Joan dotes on Chock is sweet, and he showed his devotion to her by staying right by her side during the group bowling date. That was actually one reason whyPascal thought Chock was too possessive. Right now, Joan and Chock are planning their long-distance relationship. They’re house hunting in the Big Apple, but they don’t intend to live there full-time. They’re going to divide their time between Kansas, Maryland and NYC.
Joan and Chock’s “love shack"in the Big Apple will give them a chance to relax in a fun and vibrant city. If they want action, it’s right at their fingertips. If they’d rather stay inside and cuddle, they can. When they’re ready to go back to their normal lives, which include children, they can travel to “his” or “her” house.
Chock’s from Wichita, Kansas, while Joan has put down roots in Rockville, Maryland. Long-distance relationships can be very challenging - couples need to be realistic about what they’re getting into.
Many duos who are in love get married and live in only one place, but it seems like this couple has more options.Chock appears to be quite comfortablein terms of his lifestyle, and maybe Joan is too. Clearly, since they’re looking at New York City real estate, which isn’t cheap, they’ve got enough money to live out their dreams. They can create their own love rules,maintaining their home bases and enjoying a Big Apple love nest too. It all sounds fun, but this is happening so fast.
Joan is a very sensitive person. On November 27, her late husband’s birthday, she needed a little time out in her car. While sitting alone,Joanrecorded a TikTok video that showed her honoring her past as she stepped into the future. She was mourning her late husband on his birthday. His cancer was very aggressive and when he received his diagnosis, his disease was already in an advanced stage. It was a horrible thing and his death is probablysomething that she thinks about every day.
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She will always love him. Since that happened only four years ago, Joan is still healing. The last thing she needs is to put all of her trust in someone who isn’t worth it. She has suffered terribly,more than most people have. She was married for over 30 years when her husband died. That kind of loss is so great - it’s a shift in the universe… an almost unbearable change. People who love their true loves must soldier on, but it’s so hard. They deserve respect for being brave enough to carry on.
What she has experienced is wrenching. In the video, Joan talks about spending time with Chock’s kids during Thanksgiving, and she’s grateful for Chock and his children.Joan adores her own kids too.Of course, her mind keeps drifting back to the life she used to have. Onscreen, on the proposal episode of the series, she brought past and present together, saying
“I’ve only been in love with one person, more than one now. I’m in love with Chock, and I want to spend the rest of my life with him. He makes me see a future again,
Joan went to her late husband’s grave, singing Happy Birthday to him.This stuff is heartbreaking. In the clip, she’s clearly very emotional. It all has the ring of truth. She seems like an amazing person - she appreciates the present but misses the past. She is honest about how she feels.
She made it clear that it was a great time in her life, but"weird"too. Like an undertow, the past can drag a person down, but Joan manages to move forward - this is hard to do. She is courageous, and it’s a safe bet that very fewThe Golden Bacheloretteviewers want to see this woman get hurt.
Joan is a strong person with a great attitude. However, duringThe Golden Bacheloretteprocess, she had her doubts and fears. That’s human and endearing. At times, she wasn’t quite sure which direction to go in. If she’s madly in love with Chock, she should listen to her heart, but try not to lose her head.
